I wanted to write about the Law Of Attraction for sometime but some how something else got in the way. Now I felt that is is time to say something on the subject, at the risk of starting a war on this blog.
First, let me say, I’ve seen and done quite a lot of all these visualization for success, positive thinking, positive reinforcement whatever. Being in the sales line, we become rich targets for people wanting a piece of our cash. For many years, I believed a lot of this crap. Many colleagues who succeeded swear by the stuff the trainers or so call gurus dish out.
In hindsight, I realized they just worked a lot harder than the less successful ones. I know a couple who worked, and I quote we take 1 day off a month or in 2 months. Other less aggressive colleagues are putting in at least 60 or 70 hours plus weeks. And they did well. Assuming for the moment, we define success being earning more income.
If you have not heard of the Law of Attraction, basically it is summed up as think of something hard enough, long enough, believe that your mind attracts what it thinks about and it becomes true.
The so called Law of Attraction should not be called a law in the first place as there is not concrete proof that it works 100% of the time. Calling is a principle is okay, but a law? Let’s not argue about definition here but off course the word law has a air of authority. However this law, I think, is just a corruption of a principal of sowing and reaping.
You reap what you sow. You sow a mustard seed, you should get a mustard tree but the seed might not grow. Sow enough of seeds, then you will get a tree. No guarantees but you won’t get an apple tree when you sow a mustard see.
Now, there is quite a lot of information arguing both sides of the Law of Attraction. Google for it and you have millions of pages for and against it.What I’d like to know is what do you think about the Law Of Attraction? Better yet, if you have been there, done that. I’d like to hear about it.
I’ll post my thought a bit later.
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Ana sent me a long email about this Law of Attraction. Here is what she wrote.
Hi Ed,
Although I’ve read through lots of pieces on this particular scam, including lots with your point of view, yours was especially well thought out, and encouraged me to respond as you invited. My response is long but I hope maybe it’ll help somebody. I certainly have “been there, done that.”
I started studying the so-called Law of Attraction in the 1980s, long before it became fashionable. I was living in Los Angeles, California, where all sorts of human-potential and “thought” movements were in vogue. I loved the idea of quiet meditation on your dreams — in addition to working for them, of course. I’m quite a good visualizer so as I studied, there were many nights when I’d give myself a good hour of quiet before sleep, getting into a good visualization of myself living where I wanted to live and doing everything I wanted, with the people I wanted to be with. And seeing what that felt like.
And I do admit, as my visualizations grew deeper, did it ever feel good! I must admit “The Secret” gurus are right in that respect: I did feel, in the deepest recesses of my mind, that I really already had everything I wanted! The pictures in my mind were that vivid and the feelings that genuine.
In the normal course of the day, I took every physical action in my power to make my dreams come true — well, okay, most everything. Hindsight is ever so cheap. There were some important moves I could have made but didn’t. But I did take a lot of action and talked to a lot of people. And visualized as I was being taught to do. All for naught.
Twenty-plus years later, I am nowhere near living the dreams I visualized then. Nothing happened whatsoever. When it came to where I wanted to live, a government stopped me. No so-called Law of Attraction could get past government visa rules. When it came to work … no matter what I did … no matter who I talked to … in the end someone else was always better qualified and there wasn’t even anything I could do as a volunteer given the position I was in. In short, in spite of all those lovely visualizations using the Law of Attraction, I was never able to gain a foothold in the field I desired. When it came to love, I ended up single. And when it came to money, well, I never got past the twenties in spite of years of hard work and, again, visualizations.
And that was all while practicing the Law of Attraction as it’s called today.
When “The Secret” came out, I found myself renting a room in someone’s house, 54 years old, flat broke, working as a sub teacher and trying like mad to finally find something, even something modest, in my desired field so I could spend the last decade or so of my work years happy.
My sister had told me about this film and said she believed in its principles. I decided to keep an open mind. After watching for the first time, even through the obvious hype and the outlandish claims of the “scientists,” I so wanted to believe. I mean, everyone else was believing, right? Everyone else seemed to be going for it. Why not me? I was an LOA veteran. Maybe my time had come …
I rededicated myself to visualization along with taking action steps. This time my mental imaginings were even more concrete as I put myself in the exact positions and states of mind I had so desired. I felt so good after these mental exercises that I was growing excited about possibilities coming up …
During this time I had applied for and been accepted for a teaching position in Japan. I had done it twice before, both times in what I saw as practical interim steps to my real dream of living in Spain. I had never made any money in the States and in Japan I’d had been able to save significantly for the first time in my life.
But I didn’t particularly want to do it again. At my advanced age I was rather eager to head over the Atlantic, not the Pacific. I felt I had paid my dues already and this European soul, having been born American by accident, had done her Asian stints and was ready to head home. But alas the Spanish government had their rules; I was not an EU citizen.
But by this point I’d accepted that, when I returned this time from Japan, having paid off my now-considerable debt, I would make one last-ditch, intensive attempt to find an academic-year job that would enable me to spend summers in my beloved Spain until I could retire and live there full time. This latest Japan job was not slated to start until January of ’09. I had certain reservations about this particular job, which I’d been offered by phone, but with the economy going south I was in no position to refuse it.
That was the summer of ’08 as I was trying to psych myself up for yet another Japan stint, and re-devoting myself to practicing the Law of Attraction. Then one week I found through my habitual research not one but two opportunities for jobs I had been looking for most of my working life. Non-teaching academic-year jobs do exist but are few anywhere in the world, and they tend to be either part-time gigs or pay too little to live on. I had no teaching credentials and had pretty much decided by that time that, in spite of my lifelong love for education and scholarship, I was probably not cut out for public-school teaching and would fit well in a non-classroom position.
In over 20 years of research, I had never found two such jobs advertised at the same time, especially in the same geographical area. Occasionally you’d see one, but never two. So, I thought, this was it, this was the Law of Attraction working for me! How could I have ever doubted it? One of the two jobs in particular seemed to fit me like a glove and I joyfully imagined myself working there until retirement and maybe even after! As I took the required actions to apply I firmly believed that this was to be my immediate future, this was so meant to be. The Law of Attraction was firmly in action!
The Law of Attraction even had perfect timing and was working, as the gurus say, “for the good of all.” Five months remained until I was to start the Japan job, more than enough time for the school to find someone else.
I was ever so careful in my job applications, making sure each email was as close to perfect as it could be. Then I made follow-up calls to each place. And of course I continued to visualize and use the “Law.” Unfortunately, I had no personal contacts on either campus. No matter. The Law of Attraction would work for me. The Universe had led me to these opportunities. I had visualized myself joyfully in that environment and … well, I had finally done it as the gurus said!
I didn’t even get an interview.
I had never felt so let down by a belief in my life. I hadn’t just followed the herds to “The Secret,” I had been practicing something called the Law of Attraction for years, and I thought this was it! This was where everyone would find out how wonderful it really was and how it really did work IF you just did it right!
Let me assure you, friend, it doesn’t work and is nothing more than marketer’s hype on steroids. Not only didn’t I get that opportunity I had waited my life for and had visualized many times, this time in Japan has turned out to be disastrous. The pay wasn’t enough to adequately cover my hefty credit-card payments so the balances have remained pretty much the same. The job just wasn’t a good fit, and I had felt it even when I accepted it.
I’m still in Japan, mainly because there’s nowhere else to go. There are few jobs anywhere and no money to live on while waiting for one to open up. I’m living in a guest house, commuting an hour and a half each way to an “independent contractor” job that pays only enough for food and shelter, and about as far away from Spain and anything I love as I’ve ever been. With the economy in a shambles I’m not sure when, or if, I’m ever going to be able to afford to leave here.
I find myself wondering what my life would have been like if the Law of Attraction had really worked. If I had gotten that wonderful job, the better of the two. I’d be in an enjoyable and stimulating environment, with a decent apartment, a car, at least some savings toward retirement, money to visit my friends in California whom I haven’t seen in seven years — and three glorious months each year to spend in my Spain!
If the Law of Attraction had actually worked, if it hadn’t been the scam it is … Please don’t fall for it. Don’t allow yourself to get your hopes up by using something that doesn’t actually exist. Work for things properly and plan properly and … well, maybe you’ll get some of what you’re after. People do. Just don’t hope for things that really are impossible. That’s what these so-called “LOA” marketers make their money on: desperate people looking to solve problems without work or a lot of work, or, like me, people who want the impossible. Not everything you want is within the realm of possibility. And magic exists only in stories.
Thank you for allowing me to comment. Good luck to you.
Ana
The Law of Attraction is not some magic potion that can change your life over night. It teaches you how to focus and gain insight into where you want to be. Everyday life clouds one’s vision and the LOA will teach you how to see things more clearer. For me personally i believe that the LOA does work but not like most gurus teach it! It is not easy to learn because you must re-condition yourself; and the older you are the harder it is. It took me at least 18 months to start to see how it works and that was based on full time study of at least 50 hrs per week. We are all responsible for our lives in past, present and future so we hold the ‘Key’ to change anything. The most important thing is to remember that in order to gain financially you sometimes have to step outside of your comfort zone, this for many is frightening, but nothing ventured nothing gained so they say? So LOA in my opinion is not a scam ( be careful where you learn it though) its principles are so right that one can live any dream that one desires.
Peace
Cathy
Trust me, Ana is correct.
Although it’s a nice idea, in the real world, what you think does not have anything to do with what is or will be. I read all the books followed them for many years and did not give up, until about 4 months ago. Guess what, now I have no belief in this law of attraction I have just been offered a promotion and I have newly opened opportunities for love. The law of attraction is a cruel joke that wastes peoples lives with non sense. There argument is always ‘your not doing it right’ to anyone who is not getting what they want. In hindsight I am a lot better of without this story blocking a realistic positive mind frame.
I believe success is: genetic (having the ‘eye of the tiger’), luck (random opportunities), given (hand down’s from parents etc) or just earned with a long time of sweat and toil.
The law of attraction is bull!!!! *sigh of relief because I was just thinking about a big fuzzy flying man eating platypus*
peace and love
mike
I am sad to say that a good friend of mine has decided that LOA is the missing piece to her life puzzle. She feels that immense wealth will soon materialize, er … I think the word she uses is “manifest” … It is just a multi-level marketing program selling Bob Proctor crap. I have absolutely nothing against motivation and coaching that helps people think more positively, understand what it is they actually want, and then help them remain focused on that idea longer than would a gnat. BUT selling ridiculous books and “systems” for almost $1000 a pop ought to be regulated if not illegal. Meanwhile, she and her friend have paid upfront a rather large amount of money to have their own book published on the subject … I hope they are spending plenty of time visualizing people buying that book but I would not hold my breath. What a load of bull. Meanwhile, her friends and family are getting tired of serving as her “warm” market. At least with Amway, one ends up with some useful detergent …
Yes I wanted to respond to Ana.
Your story was truely inspiring. I want to thank you for giving in detail your story and your feelings. You were honest with your frustraition. And really, thats all anyone can ask.
I want to make one point however. Concerning the law of attraction.. well I believe in it. However, attracting certain circumstances for your own happiness I do not believe is always what God has planned. I know if your are not religious, I understand. But I believe God has a plan for you, and if you can find a way to not be concerned with circumstances, and just let him guide you he will lead you to ALL that you have wished for.
As far as LOA goes. Your story reflects exactly what a lot of people feel when they use it. However, your story constantly reflects the idea “give me this and then I will be happy.” Its understandable. We all believe circumstances make us happy. More money. More travel. New people. New this new that.
But Those things never lead to true happiness.
So LOA is real. But more important than that. It is important that you look around WHERE YOU ARE NOW and begin to give thanks for everything you do have. Not in spite of what you want. But try and see what you have and give thanks for it.. Then from there you will attract anything you want.
I have used LOA over and over and every time it has worked. But life is not meant to be without obstacles. The book of Job is exactly about that. You are supposed to have obstacles so you can better define what you want. Without bad, there can be no understanding of good.
That is the only purpose it serves.
So just have faith. Enjoy life no matter what circumstances. Dream big. And see what happens.
God loves you.
Love
Charles
Read all the stories on The Secret website from people who have had amazing things happen to them. I wouldn’t be so quick to dismiss the LOA. If you don’t belive that’s what you put out to the Universe and you will never experience anything other than that. It’s not just about asking for what you want, you have to live and act like you have it already. You can’t condradict yourself.
Hi Ed, I, like Ana, believe the LOA is one big scam. It has worked however, for those who make millions selling that dream in the way of books, DVDs, conferences, courses and the like, to people who would like to think life is so easy all it takes to achieve their desires is to ask, visualize and put emotion into a specific dream. Oh, and of course, wait patiently for a while because dreams do take some time to “manifest”. I honestly believe there is no such thing as a Law of Attraction, regardless of what Rob Doyle, Bob Proctor, Marie Diamond, and the rest of LOA experts say. If you want to reach your goals you must first of all, have a very clear idea of what you want, then plan carefully, and TAKE ACTION. By that I mean move, knock on doors, ask, look for opportunities, and yes, WORK HARD (I know Law of Attraction followers won´t like this) to achieve what you want. For me, no amount of visualization has worked to get me anywhere near my goals. Whatever I have achieved so far has been through planning and following strategies towards reaching a goal, and trial and error. Alas, life is no fairy tale and magic does not exist in this world!
What a stimulating collection of comments! First, thank you, Ed, for opening up my story to the readers here. I meant what I said. I wrote it to help open people’s minds to the hype, and what has actually hurt a lot more people than it purported to help. I don’t want anyone else to get hurt believing this nonsense.
Any results you may have read are purely circumstantial. Believe me, friends, if the so-called LOA had any validity, massive results would have gone viral — in the mainstream — a long time ago! You’d be reading about it in the New York Times. You wouldn’t have heard it just from Oprah and a few other icons. You’d be reading about ordinary people. Millions of them.
Any actual results are piecemeal. You read about them here and there. Pure circumstance, nothing more.
I’m sorry, Charles, but I don’t believe in God or anything similar. I did, not too long ago. In 2000 I gave up my modest but secure life in L.A. and set off on a quest to achieve my most important dream of living in Spain. It was my spiritual home. I had gotten to know it years ago. I was meant to be there, or at least in Europe. I still feel that way.
I had nothing. A backpack, a suitcase and $2,000. That’s all. People told me, the LOA I had studied and practiced for years had told me, and I so wanted to believe, that when I needed it, the net would appear.
It has not.
I started with a spiritual pilgrimage I had wanted to do for years. While there, I both prayed and promised I’d do everything God had empowered me to do to achieve all my dreams. And I was doubly determined that whatever I achieved would be for everyone’s good, not just mine. I would work and not stop working until I had achieved.
When I left L.A. I felt in my bones that this was the time. I wasn’t waiting for the joy to appear. I had the feelings THEN!
And, just like those job opportunities in ’08, while taking all the required action, I FELT I ALREADY HAD IT!. The joy was there already.
So … if this “law” actually works, why didn’t I get it?
Actually, sometimes, telling someone they’re where they’re supposed to be now is … you know … kind of offensive. I’m sorry, I’m trying to be gentle. You sound like such a gentle person. But considering where I ended up shortly after that first post …
Two days into a month-long hospitalization in Tokyo for pneumonia, my new boss called and fired me. The company, a large, well-established chain, didn’t want to absorb the costs of my absence and medical care. I had only been there a week. I had been so incredibly GRATEFUL for getting that job after living hand-to-mouth freelance teaching. Finally, good money again and I could move on!
After returning to the guest house to recover, I ran out of money before I was able to secure a new position (it was only after 2 weeks that I felt well enough to go out looking). Out of options, I was forced to return “home” to the U.S. — with little cash, a still-massive debt due to high interest rates, no home, no job, no car, no prospects, the country in an economic tailspin not seen since the ’30s. I was 56 years old, with good experience but a little behind the eight-ball technologically … you get the picture.
I went to the home of my sister, also hit hard by the economy and overburdened with 7 other people living in her house. I had to get out of there fast.
Fast-forward to July 2011: renting another room in a somewhat rundown suburb, slaving in a factory that’s killing my body 4 days a week for a little above minimum, collecting food stamps — oh, and hounded by creditors night and day. My really cheap rent takes about 75% of my income. Gas and electricity take the rest.
Am I supposed to be here, doing this? I sincerely doubt it. What good is it doing anyone else? What contribution am I making to mankind or the world by being stuck here? My American friends are 3,000 miles west of here. I haven’t seen them in 8 years.
My Japan visa is valid until 2013. But even if another job there materialized, I’ve no money to return. My credit is gone.
Habits being hard to break, I still express constant gratitude for the roof over my head which I managed to find and the food I eat. Gratitude is a habit; I’ve never not been thankful, at any time in my life.
But it’s done me no good. Knowing there are people worse off, I still express it. It’s a good habit. I reminds me that I’m still human. But it doesn’t “attract” anything.
Actually, if you believe the drivel about “like attracts like,” then what you would get after expressing heartfelt gratitude for what you already have is … What do you think? More of the same! According to that philosophy, you will get more of what you have now. And that’s all. Not what you want. Just more of the same kind of thing you have now. Because like attracts like. If you’re all into gratitude, if you express joy for what you’ve got, you will get more of … what you’ve got. Right?
Your circumstances will never change. You just keep gettin’ what you got.
Gigi, my heart goes out to anyone taken in by all this. As you said, at least in Amway the cheerleading leads you to something useful. You can clean with it.
Z, there was no contradiction in anything we said. When I found those opportunities I felt I already had them, not that I was going to get them so I’ll be happy then. Again, it still doesn’t work because if it did, all you would get is more of the same thing you have now. Really. Think about it.
And as Argel said, who’re the ones making the money? The marketers. Next time you buy a book or CD on the “LOA,” just remind yourself that it ain’t you getting rich.
Mike’s list of the elements of success is spot-on: hard work, chance, inheritance, circumstance. Probably a combination thereof gives the best chance.
Thank you all again.